“Jay Leno” Speaks?

May 5, 2008

So, I received the following email from a relative this weekend.

It really does serve as a fascinating example of backasswardness and logic twisted to the snapping point.

I’m hoping that posting my own response (in red) on this blog will make me feel less inclined to further alienate myself from my extended family by doing a “reply all.” Take a look, and let me know what you think:

Too good not to pass onwell said.

—– interesting perspective by Jay Leno…

I hope you will all read to the end. Jay Leno puts it into perspective and makes us think about the pathetic negativity. That’s right, Jay Leno!! He may be a comic, but he has his head on straight.

Jay Leno wrote this; it’s the Jay Leno we don’t often see….

First off, Jay Leno obviously didn’t write this. Although, It’s as funny as most of his monologues…(Zing!)

“The other day I was reading Newsweek magazine and came across some poll data I found rather hard to believe. It must be true, given the source, right?

The Newsweek poll alleges that 67 percent of Americans are unhappy with the direction the country is headed, and 69 percent of the country is unhappy with the performance of the President. In essence, 2/3’s of the citizenry just ain’t happy and want a change.

This is true. The President’s approval rating has been below 35 per cent since October and has not cracked 40 per cent since September 2006.

So being the knuckle dragger I am, I started thinking, ”What are we so unhappy about?” Is it that we have electricity and running water 24 hours a day, 7 days a week?


Is our unhappiness the result of having air conditioning in the summer and heating in the winter?

I’m not sure I follow your logic, Jay Leno.

Could it be that 95.4 percent of these unhappy folks have a job?

Oh, I see what you’re doing here. Because we’re the richest country in the world, because we have it so good, we don’t have the right to disagree with our government.

Maybe it is the ability to walk into a grocery store at any time, and see more food in moments than Darfur has seen in the last year?

Hmm, Darfur. Darfur? They’re hungry there? So long as I’m fed, who cares?

Maybe it is the ability to drive from the Pacific Ocean to the Atlantic Ocean without having to present identification papers as we move through each state?

Unlike, for example, Palestinian people who can’t go to work because of Israeli fences and checkpoints in their neighborhoods. Yeah, we got it pretty good.

Or possibly the hundreds of clean and safe motels we would find along the way that can provide temporary shelter?

Or possibly the THOUSANDS of temporary shelters that Katrina victims STILL CALL HOME. (Some of which, by the way, are contaminated with formaldehyde).

I guess having thousands of restaurants with varying cuisine from around the world is just not good enough.

The food court at the mall doesn’t make up for the steady erosion of our civil liberties over the past 7 years? Crybabies.

Or could it be that when we wreck our car, emergency workers show up and provide services to help all, and even send a helicopter to take you to the hospital.

Or could it be the blatant neglect with which our government has treated returning veterans injured in Iraq and Afghanistan? Have you seen the crumbling military hospitals? Have you seen the statistics on mental illness among returning soldiers?

Perhaps you are one of the 70 percent of Americans who own a home. You may be upset with knowing that in the unfortunate case of a fire, a group of trained firefighters will appear in moments and use top notch equipment to extinguish the flames thus saving you, your family and your belongings.

Perhaps you are a Katrina survivor who was stranded for days on your own rooftop, or packed into the superdome, or forced to leave your home town for good and start over.

Or if, while at home watching one of your many flat screen TVs, a burglar or prowler intrudes, an officer equipped with a gun and a bullet-proof vest will come to defend you and your family against attack or loss.

My apartment has many flat-screen TV’s, and smells of rich mahogany.

This all in the backdrop of a neighborhood free of bombs or militias raping and pillaging the residents. Neighborhoods where 90 percent of teenagers own cell phones and computers.

In 2006, The Guardian,a British newspaper, estimated that 655,000 Iraqis had died as a result of the US invasion. These people’s neighborhoods ARE NOT free of bombs, militias, raping, and pillaging.

How about the complete religious, social and political freedoms we enjoy that are the envy of everyone in the world? Maybe that is what has 67 percent of you folks unhappy.

Maybe it’s the fact that the current president has endorsed the use of torture as an interrogation tactic, is responsible for atrocities in prisons we set up in Iraq, secretly set up detention facilities outside of US territory, and handed high-value prisoners over to nations that employ torture regularly, all in an effort to circumvent our own nation’s laws. Maybe some of us think these policies demean the very ideas upon which this nation was founded?

Fact is we are the largest group of ungrateful, spoiled brats the world has ever seen. No wonder the world loves the U.S. , yet has a great disdain for its citizens. They see us for what we are. The most blessed people in the world who do nothing but complain about what we don’t have, and what we hate about the country instead of thanking the good Lord we live here.

Perhaps we are each of those things. Perhaps our greatest failing, and the reason our nation has lost the respect of the rest of the world, is because we as a people fail to look beyond our own cushy circumstances and recognize just how bad some folks have it.

I know, I know. What about the President who took us into war and has no plan to get us out? The President who has a measly 31 percent approval rating?
Is this the same President who guided the nation in the dark days after 9/11? The President that cut taxes to bring an economy out of recession? Could this be the same guy who has been called every name in the book for succeeding in keeping all the spoiled ungrateful brats safe from terrorist attacks?

More than 4,000 US servicemen have died in the Iraq war. That’s more than died on 9/11. Plus more than half a million Iraqis, multitudes of Afghans…who has been made safe, exactly? Like most Americans, I was supportive of US efforts to break up terrorist networks, and even invade Afghanistan in order to disrupt Al Quaida and the Taliban. But, like 70% of Americans today, I fail to see how invading Iraq has done anything other than cause exponentially more deaths than any terrorist attack ever has.

The Commander-In Chief of an all-volunteer army that is out there defending you and me? Did you hear how bad the President is on the news or talk show? Did this news affect you so much, make you so unhappy you couldn’t take a look around for your self and see all the good things and be glad?

It does affect me that much when I learn that we launch a war based on false pretenses, torture our captives, and disregard the rule of law in our own country.

Think about it….are you upset at the President because he actually caused you personal pain OR is it because the “Media” told you he was failing to kiss your sorry ungrateful behind every day.

You think about it, Jay Leno. I’m not upset because of my own personal pain. I’m upset because of the pain of millions who have been harmed as a result of US policies over the past 7 years. Some of them live here, some overseas. They are people too.

Make no mistake about it The troops in Iraq and Afghanistan have volunteered to serve, and in many cases may have died for your freedom. There is currently no draft in this country. They didn’t have to go.

All the more reason to be prudent in the ways in which we deploy them. All the more reason to treat them with dignity when they return. All the more reason to hold our elected officials responsible when they abuse our military.

They are able to refuse to go and end up with either a ”general” discharge, an ”other than honorable” discharge or, worst case scenario, a ”dishonorable” discharge after a few days in the brig.

Re-read this last paragraph. I’ll give a dollar to anyone who can successfully defend this reasoning. Is the point here to dismiss the sacrifices made by our military personnel? The more I think about it, the sicker this reasoning sounds. You want to tell the family of a slain American soldier that maybe they should have taken “a few days in the brig” rather than go overseas and die? Shame on you, Jay Leno.

So why then the flat-out discontentment in the minds of 69 percent of Americans? Say what you want, but I blame it on the media. If it bleeds, it leads; and they specialize in bad news. Everybody will watch a car crash with blood and guts. How many will watch kids selling lemonade at the corner? The media knows this and media outlets are for-profit corporations. They offer what sells, and when criticized, try to defend their actions by “justifying” them in one way or another. Just ask why they tried to allow a murderer like O.J. Simpson to write a book about “how he didn’t kill his wife, but if he did he would have done it this way”…Insane!

Actually, US news organizations have been criticized since the invasion of Iraq for NOT SHOWING images of dead Iraqis, dead American soldiers, and the general carnage of war. Instead, as the New York Times reported last week, television networks have been employing retired military personnel as “analysts” who are trained and fed talking points directly from the Pentagon. But, let some white girl go missing in the Bahamas, and we’re in for months of wall-to-wall coverage.

Stop buying the negativism you are fed everyday by the media. Shut off the TV, burn Newsweek, and use the New York Times for the bottom of your bird cage. Then start being grateful for all we have as a country. There is exponentially more good than bad.

I just got a tax refund check from the government! So I can afford to ignore the suffering of millions who are less fortunate, and I have no reason to ask my government to act responsibly or hold it accountable for its actions.

We are among the most blessed people on Earth, and should thank God several times a day or at least be thankful and appreciative.

Amen. And with great privilege comes greater responsibility.

“With hurricanes, tornados, fires out of control, mud slides, flooding, severe thunderstorms tearing up the country from one end to another, and with the threat of bird flu and terrorist attacks, “Are we sure this is a good time to take God out of the Pledge of Allegiance?”

Whoa! Bird flu? Mud slides? Jay Leno, what are you smoking? And who said anything about the pledge of allegiance? Here’s an idea. Look beyond your own nose and care about people you don’t have to. Your government is you. Hold yourself and your government to higher standards. Speak up. Love.

That’s not whining, friend. That’s loving your neighbor as yourself. That’s democracy.

Jay Leno

Please keep this in circulation. There are so many people that need to read this and grasp the truth of it all.


  1. Oy vey.

    Where to begin?

    My favorite neo-con talking point tripe is when the anonymous author (probably too ashamed to give their real name, lest they be recognized as a defender of the miserable failure they call a “commander in chief”)says that ‘The world loves the US but hates its citizens.’

    I think it’s probably the opposite. Most people from other countries like Americans just fine, it’s just that our government has been largely retarded, particularly in the area of foreign policy, since the early fifties.

    Chimpeach the Chimperor.

  2. I just hope Jay Leno reads this. hee.

    ps: Actual quote from my Dad, regarding the White House: “We don’t even have a chimp in pants in there right now.” …Yes indeed. I think that says it.

  3. well said.

  4. The ironic part is that the purported Jay Leno essay may actually be a hoax. And here is why:

    When you read this http://www.worldnetdaily.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=53028 commentary by Craig R. Smith, titled “Made in the USA: Spoiled brats” dated November 20, 2006, you may find big chunks of the text to be quite familiar, especially if you had read the text ascribed to Jay Leno. Mr. Craig R. Smith is president and CEO of Swiss America Trading Corporation who, per his company website (see http://www.swissamerica.com/pres.php), contributes a weekly column for the Worldnetdaily.com newsletter. When you check the newsletter’s home page at http://www.worldnetdaily.com/index.php, you will find among other contributors a few familiar faces, who have a reputation of viewing the challenges of today’s world from a certain well defined angle.

    If you want the whole story, you will find it in the “Hits the Nail on the Head” report on Snopes.com, which can be found here: http://www.snopes.com/politics/soapbox/hitnail.asp.

  5. BS on the “650,000 Iraqi’s killed” since US Invasion

    you are quoting the discredited Lancet study, paid for by Soros and admitted to be a pre election ploy, even Harvard said it was statistically invalid
    probably overstates deaths by a factor of 10
    Think about it, violent deaths have actually declined since US invasion, or have you already forgotten about the 500,000 bodies found?

  6. Thanks for this post. I just got the same thing in a message, attributed now to David Letterman! I knew that did not sound like Dave, so looked it up on Urban Legends. Thanks for putting my thoughts into words. Now, shall I send your blog post to the person who sent the message? Hmmm?

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